Time Getting Shorter

It’s extraordinary how time slips by, and this is highlighted by the fact that it has been a long time since you’ve received news from Yaraka, yet it hasn’t seemed long—if you get where we’re coming from! And if that doesn’t quite make sense, try this: we’ve been busy even when we haven’t been busy.

Like the rest of Australia, we’re doing it tough. It started with coronavirus restrictions and all their implications, and the challenges have continued to mount.

This region has been seriously affected by soaring fuel and electricity costs, along with the cost-of-living crisis, resulting in overall higher prices that often seem unexplainable and unjustifiable.

As most people are ‘doing it tough,’ there’s been a serious decline in caravan numbers through this region, impacting small businesses. It’s said that some may not be able to reopen, with electricity costs being a primary factor.

During these tough trading times, it’s not just about ‘belt-tightening’; we have to look at new ways of surviving as businesses across Australia collapse at alarming rates.

However, amidst all this doom and gloom, we always find plenty to laugh about! Recently, we had a laugh about individuals claiming ‘Sovereign Rights’ for themselves, declaring that they’re not under Australian law and therefore can’t be given tickets for speeding in unregistered vehicles, all while abusing the poor police in the process.

This got us thinking, so we’ve decided to declare sovereign rights for ourselves!

Henceforth, we declare Sovereign Rights for the hotel. These rights apply across the entire hotel property, and we’ll be rolling out some cash flow incentives. The first is that the hotel complex will now be known as ‘The Kingdom of Tranquillity.’

As a kingdom, there must be a monarchy. We’re proud to announce that Chris will now be addressed as King Chris, Gerry as Queen Gerry, and Noel and Susie as the Duke and Duchess of Tranquillity. You may address them accordingly.

Now that the foundations are in place, let’s talk money. Photos and autographs will come at a price—amounts depend on how you treat us, with bows and curtsies certainly earning a discount.

The Kingdom of Tranquillity will also be selling passports, which will be priced accordingly as the covers are made from locally sourced kangaroo leather.

Additionally, we’ll be offering degrees from the University of Tranquillity, operating out of the back shed. This is a multifunctional university where you can earn a degree in anything you desire. For instance, if you have aspirations of getting into politics, we’ve got you covered with our ‘p=bs2’ course. You decide how long you wish to study—short courses are cheap, while longer ones are more costly. Bachelor’s degrees are obviously less expensive than PhDs, and let’s not forget the doctorates—payment plans are available.

Our most esteemed (and expensive) course is the Common-Sense Degree, which is a rare subject in today’s society. A retired Prime Minister has even expressed interest in heading this department, so we’ve granted him a professorship. He’s a bit resentful about working in the back shed, arguing that the course fees justify a Hilton Penthouse-style facility. Negotiations are ongoing—fortunately in our favour—as we’ve threatened to revoke his professorship if he insists on an upgrade.

You can also become a resident of the Kingdom of Tranquillity! For $2,000, you’ll receive a small plaque with your name on it in the ground. But wait, there’s more! For the first 87 customers, it’s two names for the price of one, so loved ones can be together—does it get any better?

As time goes by (and it seems to go quicker these days), the King will make further announcements on new cash flow incentives. (Isn’t humour great?)

When we haven’t been busy with travellers and laughs, we’ve been hard at work ticking off items from our bucket list. Our big project this year was to get rid of the dilapidated shade cloth structure between the hotel and accommodation buildings. We aimed to complete this by early March, so we started during the hottest part of the year, with temperatures in the high thirties. Demolishing the old structure was quite satisfying! All that remained in good condition were four steel posts at the western end.

We had a plan for these posts! With help from the brilliant Russell and Sharon Wilkins, we transformed the posts into what’s now ‘The Stage.’ The posts became supports for walls and a roof made of corrugated iron, with a concrete floor that we then carpeted. The open area in front now features tables, seating, sun umbrellas, and a shaded area, and we think it turned out rather well!

The urgency for completing this was driven by a booking from a charity group for a St Patrick’s Day celebration. They arrived, and we survived! Despite the heatwave, we managed to serve 130 diners a silver-service meal with a choice of two mains and two desserts, and the feedback was overwhelmingly positive. The ‘Stage’ was officially opened by Tania Kernaghan and her support singers. It couldn’t have been better—except maybe a bit cooler!

We’ve been fortunate this year to welcome several groups who used Yaraka as a stopover, which has been good for business. Recently, we catered lunches for 305 people from the Variety Club of Queensland. This took extensive planning, but everyone was delighted with the result. The convoy left around 2:30 pm, and by 4:30, everything was back to normal, with no trace they’d ever been here.

We’re so lucky to have skilled helpers like Noel and Sue, the Duke and Duchess, and our multi-talented friends, Russell and Sharon, who make events like this possible.

The Duke and Duchess, who have been incredible support here for the last three years, have shown their love for Yaraka by making it their permanent home. They’ve moved into the highset home behind Bob and Kathie Long—a blessing for us and the business!

Gerry and I are often asked how long we’ll keep doing what we’re doing—when we’ll retire (this is our retirement hobby!) or if we’re planning to sell. At this stage, we still enjoy our hobby! The returning travellers and new friends keep us active, and we never get bored. However, if a sensible offer from a suitable party were made, we might consider it.

The next ‘Musing’ shouldn’t take as long as this one—hopefully! We look forward to seeing you here again, and we send our best wishes to you all.